Ultimate Guide to Dating Asian Women


What I’ve Learned About Meeting Asian Women

It’s been a while since I’ve used Asian dating sites, in fact, not since prior to Y2K, if anyone can remember what that was. A ways back, anyway, and I’ve now been married to a wonderful Asian woman for almost 12 years — all starting with those dating sites when I knew nothing about Asian women except that I was attracted to them.

As for your personal attraction to Asian women, let me forewarn you a bit. If you’re looking for a woman who will “stand by her man” and say nothing while do you as please, forget it. That woman isn’t Asian, or anything else that I know of.

Asian women are full of determination and expect their men to be mature. In fact, one Asian woman I dated told me: “Men are like fine wine. The older they get, they better they are.” Meaning, of course, that they’ve gotten all the nonsense out of them.

 Also, I once worked in Japan for a year. I’m not sure if things have changed, but in the Japanese culture, men were then expected to bring home their paychecks and assign them over to their wives, who thereafter controlled all finances and gave their husbands the equivalent of a (petty) allowance. Something to think about. Asian women are taught to be frugal as well as respectful of both elders (theirs, but not necessarily you if you screw up) and hard work (read: money).

Maybe I’m being a bit too harsh. Asian women can be extremely sweet and trusting by nature, but the cultural DNA is always there. So if you’re seeking a woman of rare beauty, refinement, culture and smarts, as well as a premier domestic support system, you’re looking in the right place, but ultimately you’ll have to own up to your part of the bargain.

I hope I haven’t scares you off, because I personally wouldn’t trade my wife for anyone of any race or culture.

How about sex? you ask. Asians, like everyone else, are all different when it comes to their bedroom desires, but you won’t be disappointed. I wouldn’t recommend an arranged or blind marriage, but if you go through a common dating ritual, you’ll find out everything you need to know about your woman. And to be blunt, if sex is all you desire, then yes, Asian women get horny too. You may not find too many one-night stands, though. Asian women know how to protect themselves and treasure their bodies.

Still, with all these advisories, I consider Asian women the finest spouses, girlfriends and lovers on the face of the planet. Be prepared for happiness, but be prepared to do your part.

What Does It Take to Find an Asian?

Asian women, of course, come in two types — those brought up here either from birth or a young age, and those we often call (derisively at times) FOBs (fresh off the boat). There will be a difference. Those bred here tend to be more like other American women (pardon the generalization), so if you’re looking for the qualities I mentioned above, you may want to go FOB.  Still, as Tiger Mom Amy Chua showed everyone, Asian women brought up in the States can be imbued with all kinds of great qualities and challenges. So it’s an individual thing, and perhaps my dichotomy doesn’t always pertain. Don’t let any distinction deter you from pursuing any Asian woman who attracts you. They’re mostly winners, and you will be too.



That being said, regardless of their origins, where are the best places to find and meet Asian women? If you’re referring to physical locations, then obviously it helps if you live in or around a fairly large city. Here in Southern California where I reside, there are whole communities built up around Asian immigrants, going by the tags of Little Tokyo, Thai Town, KTown (Korean) and so on. While you’ll find Asians often sticking to these communities, they usually have to work, shop and hang out elsewhere. So the malls, restaurants, nightclubs and the usual haunts will be frequently by Asian women.

This is not to say you can’t go to one of their enclaves to meet and get to know Asian women. The actor Nicholas Cage met his gorgeous Korean wife at a nightclub in L.A.’s KTown (wonder if they’re still married). So it all comes down to your resourcefulness and confidence in venturing to where the Asians are and then striking a conversation. No talk=no babe.

I remember even meeting two very attractive Korean women while driving in Pasadena, where I used to live. Somehow, I got up the nerve to roll down my window and ask them to pull over. Incredibly, they did. I took them both to lunch at a Korean barbecue and ended up dating one for a while. Problem was, it was the other one to whom I was attracted, and she wasn’t interested. When I finally managed to pin her down and ask for a date, she was heading off to the homeland for an extended stay. I gave up on that dream and moved on.

The Solution: Understanding Asians and Asian Culture

Where I ultimately met my wife, however, was through an Asian dating site. It wasn’t a direct rendezvous, however. I first had to endure a date with an Asian woman who couldn’t stand me, nor I her. Now here’s the interesting part: If you make the effort, eventually the stars will align and you’ll find your dream Asian. This women who detested me and vice versa (no need to go into the reasons) ended up calling me and introducing me to the woman who became my loving wife. And it all started with that disastrous date from the Asian dating site. (Okay, out of all the women I met through dating sites, only one or two were disasters; most of the women were, like me, putting out feelers, looking for the right match, and they were more than pleasant and easy to get along with.)


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